Dear Zoroastrian Lady,
Your opinion is that "educational qualifications are required for life partners to talk on the same level".
So are we are talking of a Phd lady only looking for a Phd man, or vice versa, and the 12th standard pass (HSC) would look down on an SSC, and the BSc would look down on the HSC, and so on?
So are we talking of an educational caste system in the Zoroastrian community in India?
If a woman is a Mcom and a man is a Bcom or vice-versa, would the 2 extra years of study really make any difference in the real world? What does a man look for in a woman, does he look for paper degrees and high education, or does he look for love, goodness of heart, and fidelity?
And if a man or woman is not a graduate now, is there anything to stop him from learning for a degree later on? Today all degrees are possible with distance education.
We sincerely suggest not to lay a heavy emphasis on education. This is the bane of the Zoroastrian community that girls that are highly qualified do not wish to marry men who are less qualified or vice versa. In real life, in the real world, in married life, paper degrees (which remain on paper and do not work in real life) are not so important so long as the spouse is settled in life or has a promising life ahead of him.
For eg., if a man is a Bcom and the woman an MCom, both are considered to be educated and should be able to talk to one another on the same level. Or vice versa.
In the past, our forefathers used to appreciate men and women who were honest and had faith in our religion. The ancient Persians trained their children to "shoot a straight arrow, ride a horse and speak the truth." They were proud of this. Everything else was secondary.
We do feel strongly about this education becoming a barrier between our young people. As per the religion, we should have no barriers between two Zoroastrians wanting to marry. Anything that acts as a barrier impedes marriage, so impedes the religion, and should be discarded. So let us discard this educational caste system.
Look back a hundred years. Would the Zoroastrian lady of those days have looked for a Zoroastrian man with "ambition", or "educated", or "in business"?
No. She would have looked for a honest, brave man who would earn an honest living and protect her and her children, a Zoroastrian husband so that they could practise and further the ancient religion together and teach it to their children. In those days, that was how our grandmothers and great-grandmothers thought.
The people of this day and age, due to foreign influence, think that ambition, education, and business interests are important. However, the fact is that these things are not important.
Ambition can only get you into a high-flying life, in which you loose your spiritual roots, and you have "no time" for the real meaning of life. The truly happy people are the ones with no ambition, and who are happy with every day of life. If the Parsee boys have no ambition, if they are happy -go-lucky and if they are brave and honest and do not do bad things, then we are proud of them.
Education, in the modern foreign sense, is nothing. It is pitiful. It does not develop spirituality or teach you to be a better human being. True education should be spiritual as well as practical. True education can be seen in the villages, where people know practical aspects of life eg, farming, cooking, weaving clothes etc. as well as spiritual aspects.
One may be a Phd, but if one is alone and wants to cook food for his/her child and doesnt know how to, then all the so-called education that one has gained through universities is useless. The person will realize this to be true that day.
Business - in which one competes with other businesses in a rat race - is also not so meaningful in the real scheme of life. There are millions of ordinary people out there without their own business. They have jobs, and they are happy. There are millions of families on jobs. Business is not the be and end all of things.
So, there is nothing wrong with lack of ambition, nor in lack of western education, nor in working in a 9 to 5 job, nor the Parsi language - it defines us.
If some ladies think they are now "superior" to the men due to their western education, ambition, moving up the corporate ladder, etc., it is quite wrong.
We are quite aware of this superior attitude, where a 12 std lady refuses to marry a 10th std boy, a BSc refuses to marry a 12th std, and an MSc refuses to marry a BSc. This is nonsense.
Such a superior attitude should be discarded first - the ladies should realize that life with a good, loving husband is more important then all these fake and artificial products of modern civilization. These things are of no use in the long run.
When a person passes away from the world, it doesnt matter if he/she was a Bsc or Msc or Phd. What matters is the good he/she has done in this life, and whether he/she has been honest and brave.
As Dr. Ichaporia wrote from a lost fragment of the Avesta:
"noit chami zazva yo noit urune zazva
noit chami zazushi ya noit urune zazushi
naechish idha zarathushtra sush yatha him adare mashyaka"
"He has not won anything who has not won (anything) for his soul
She has not won anything who has not won (anything) for her soul.
(because) O Zarathushtra there is no real (material) prosperity on earth as man knows it."
This is why, the religious Zarathushtris believe that the only solution is for the coming Shah Behram to take us back to the land, away from these modern influences which are destroying our community, indeed all ancient cultures worldwide.
When we farm the land, when our women recognize the true value of a man lies in his bravery and honesty, not in his ambition or education, only then will our community prosper again.
A Parsi lady wrote:
"there are plenty of times, when we have had proposals from non-Parsi boys, who are willing to marry, but its my bond with my religion and God, that I have been able to stay away and so are my other friends."
I am very glad to hear that. I sincerely believe that it is due to such Zarathushtri women as youself and your friends, that our religion will be carried on into the future and will not die out.
The women are the true preservers of any small community. When the women of a small community go astray, the community is doomed.
I hope you, and Parsi women like you, do not give a very high importance to education.
I know Parsi men who do not give any importance at all to this, and would be willing to marry a non-SSC Zarathushtri lady who could not read or write, or speak English, provided she believes in the religion and has full faith in it.
Most of the Parsi men are like that - they do not believe in giving undue importance to education. The Parsi women should also be like that. They should look at the man and the Sudreh Kusti around his waist - not the degrees he has tucked away in a cupboard in his house and how much cash he can earn.
Modern education (which derives from foreign lands) should not become a barrier between Zaratuhstri men and women. If education has become a barrier, it is wrong.
Zoroastrian Matrimonial Page
Traditional Zoroastrianism Home Page
Saga of the Aryans Home Page